Sunday, October 7, 2018

Words, Again

I have missed this little pocket of screen that some how feels it is just you and me, Joan as a writer in small places. Face book is the posting of my work, my projects, my sending on of calls to action and thank yous to all who live there. Here I am the the aging woman, the writer who never did another book but yet it feels as if I have never stopped writing. A 78 year old woman with yet another body mystery--a mass in my left lung that is not cancer, but a rare disease known as granulomatous inflammation--a word I cannot really pronounce. An autoimmune misreading, trying too hard to protect, it has created a hardness of cells that can be systemic but for now seems confined to my lung. The mysteries of the body misreading itself, a tenderness for its fallacies, when it errs on the side of protection. How human that all is--to create difficulties from too much vigilance.

I am still in Melbourne, still with Di, Cello still walks beside me, he and I slower, more crooked. We slant like Emily Dickinson's famous line, but I am afraid no truth seeps in. Other then the changing body, the changing abilities, the changing time one remains vertical. I am deep in helping to edit the Sinister Wisdom issue celebrating LHA's 45 years of existence along with wonderful LHA-ers: Red, Shawn, Morgan, Saskia, Deb, Maxine, Flavia. From 23,000 miles away, collaboration.
A Flame Robin, an Emblem of Passion, 2017, Anglesea, Australia

Like this pulsing heart of life, my heart, my head sometimes feels like bursting as I follow Trump's bellowing, the easy cruelties, the rush of money because Capitalism does not care who lives behind barbed wires or cocked guns-the overstatements of intent--I watch my NY Yankees, a daughter of the Bronx, I still am--and the the Boston Red Sox's sweat shirts assert "Do Damage"--not just simply win or do the best you can. The new Supreme Court Judge, a strange child man whose face pouts much like Trump's when he feels wrong done by, now a life time of power. Democrats demonized as the extreme left--we predicted this so many years ago when "liberal" became too scary for its progressive attachments--the center does not hold, it does not exist. But and the but is needed, we march, we get arrested, we write and create and vote and get others to vote and will never give up this resistance. 

I am very cold often and tired but books clothe me--my watercolor pencils take me into Cezanne's world, I miss my old friends and wish they were closer-- a kind of loneliness has been a companion my whole life, now intensified by this great distance from my historical home. I fool myself, this loneliness is in my bones.
A wonderful Visit with Morgan and Saskia, 2017

14 comments:

  1. Hello my friend - glad to see you here

    ReplyDelete
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    1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

      Delete
    2. EFFECTIVE AND POWERFUL LOVE SPELL CASTER ONLINE THANKS DR GBOJIE +2349066410185 
      My Husband and I have been together for 3years, we started having issues (JANUARY  12TH) and we both broke up this years, after our fight over his cheating habits which they all say it's not their fault but I was the one getting hurt for it . I was upset over the whole issue that I had to call for the separation but I felt really bad. The separation really had effects on my daughter who had to live away from her father that I had to think of a way to settle things out and find solution to my husband's awkward behavior. I found out about a spell caster  (Dr gbojie  ) on this site (  http://gbojiespiritualtemple.website2.me     ) who helped me with the problem to make my spouse come back to me and make him stop cheating. Soon, Richard came back to me begging at Sicily where I stayed after our divorce and I told him he has to show me he has changed for me to believe him. He came back twice after that day to Sicily begging me to have him back. Its been 1 month  now since my husband came back to me and we have been living together since that day. I believe this man can also help you too in getting your Ex lover back and also solve other problems  His email address is ( gbojiespiritualtemple@gmail.com  or gbojiespiritualtemple@yahoo.com ) also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2349066410185

      Delete


    3. I will forever be indebted to the great Doctor TAKUTA for fixing my broken marriage after my husband left me for his mistress for 3 months. I never believed in spells until my friend introduced me to him. At first, I was skeptical about him because I heard a lots about false spell casters but I put my doubts behind me for i was desperate to get my husband back and I did according to what he instructed me to do. Now my husband is back just within 48 hours of contacting him. I'm living happily with my husband again after months of divorce and I will not rest till he's known all over the world. He's also specialize in money spells, lottery spells, sickness spells E.T.C. Get connected with Doctor Takuta now, his email is takutaspellalter@gmail.com or WhatsApp on +27788634102



















































      I will forever be indebted to the great Doctor TAKUTA for fixing my broken marriage after my husband left me for his mistress for 3 months. I never believed in spells until my friend introduced me to him. At first, I was skeptical about him because I heard a lots about false spell casters but I put my doubts behind me for i was desperate to get my husband back and I did according to what he instructed me to do. Now my husband is back just within 48 hours of contacting him. I'm living happily with my husband again after months of divorce and I will not rest till he's known all over the world. He's also specialize in money spells, lottery spells, sickness spells E.T.C. Get connected with Doctor Takuta now, his email is takutaspellalter@gmail.com or WhatsApp on +27788634102













































      I will forever be indebted to the great Doctor TAKUTA for fixing my broken marriage after my husband left me for his mistress for 3 months. I never believed in spells until my friend introduced me to him. At first, I was skeptical about him because I heard a lots about false spell casters but I put my doubts behind me for i was desperate to get my husband back and I did according to what he instructed me to do. Now my husband is back just within 48 hours of contacting him. I'm living happily with my husband again after months of divorce and I will not rest till he's known all over the world. He's also specialize in money spells, lottery spells, sickness spells E.T.C. Get connected with Doctor Takuta now, his email is takutaspellalter@gmail.com or WhatsApp on +27788634102
















































      Delete
    4. REAL URGENT EFFECTIVE SPELL CASTER TO HELP BRING BACK EX LOVER AND SAVE MARRIAGE https://urgentspellcast.wordpress.com/

      Hello everyone my is Elisa Keily am so over whelmed with joy all thanks to Dr Raypower spell.my husband left me for another woman few years back and I was very devastated cause I never did anything wrong to him,I was left with my two kid and a job that pays little.i was almost giving up until I saw a testimony online about Dr Raypower and I decided to contact him.i explained my problem to him and he assured me I'll see a positive result after 24hurs,surprisingly my husband came back the day after the spell begging me to forgive him and promised to never leave.my husband has been back for 6 months now and we've never had any issues, am glad I didn't doubt Dr Raypower cause he sure can solve any problems with fast relief you can also contact him for help now

      Email: Urgentspellcast@gmail.com or Urgentspellcast@yahoo.com

      Website: http://urgentspellcast.website2.me/

      Blog: https://drraypower.blogspot.com/ 

      WhatsApp: +14243308109














      REAL URGENT EFFECTIVE SPELL CASTER TO HELP BRING BACK EX LOVER AND SAVE MARRIAGE https://urgentspellcast.wordpress.com/

      Hello everyone my is Elisa Keily am so over whelmed with joy all thanks to Dr Raypower spell.my husband left me for another woman few years back and I was very devastated cause I never did anything wrong to him,I was left with my two kid and a job that pays little.i was almost giving up until I saw a testimony online about Dr Raypower and I decided to contact him.i explained my problem to him and he assured me I'll see a positive result after 24hurs,surprisingly my husband came back the day after the spell begging me to forgive him and promised to never leave.my husband has been back for 6 months now and we've never had any issues, am glad I didn't doubt Dr Raypower cause he sure can solve any problems with fast relief you can also contact him for help now

      Email: Urgentspellcast@gmail.com or Urgentspellcast@yahoo.com

      Website: http://urgentspellcast.website2.me/

      Blog: https://drraypower.blogspot.com/ 

      WhatsApp: +14243308109

      Delete

  2. I want to give a big thanks to a great spell caster commonly known as DR TAKUTA for the great spiritual prayers he did in my life by bringing my ex-lover back to me after many months of breakup and loneliness. With this, I am convinced that you are sent to this word to rescue people from heartbreaks and also to help us get the solution to every relationship problem. for those of you out there who have one relationship problem or the other why not contact DR TAKUTA. that is the best place you can solve all your problems, including a lack of jobs and promotions, binding and marriage spells, divorce and attraction spells, good luck and lotto spells, fertility, and pregnancy spells, and also the business success and customer increase, winning court cases and many more. contact him at takutaspellalter@gmail.com or contact mobile contact +27788634102

    ReplyDelete

  3. I want to give a big thanks to a great spell caster commonly known as DR TAKUTA for the great spiritual prayers he did in my life by bringing my ex-lover back to me after many months of breakup and loneliness. With this, I am convinced that you are sent to this word to rescue people from heartbreaks and also to help us get the solution to every relationship problem. for those of you out there who have one relationship problem or the other why not contact DR TAKUTA. that is the best place you can solve all your problems, including a lack of jobs and promotions, binding and marriage spells, divorce and attraction spells, good luck and lotto spells, fertility, and pregnancy spells, and also the business success and customer increase, winning court cases and many more. contact him at takutaspellalter@gmail.com or contact mobile contact +27788634102

    ReplyDelete
  4. I FOUND HELP
    Hello, i am from canada, I want to share this great testimony about how
    Dr.uneme helped me bring back my ex lover, During my search for solution i
    came in contact with Dr. uneme details and through his help my lover came
    back to me within 48 hours. So with these i am so bold to advise anyone
    seeking for a way to get there lover back to contact Dr.uneme on WhatsApp:
    { +2348143813120 }or via email at: {Unemespellben@gmail.com } I am so happy
    at least myself and my lover are back to each other again and going to
    spend the Life time together Thank to Dr. uneme once again....

    ReplyDelete
  5. I FOUND HELP
    Hello, i am from canada, I want to share this great testimony about how
    Dr.uneme helped me bring back my ex lover, During my search for solution i
    came in contact with Dr. uneme details and through his help my lover came
    back to me within 48 hours. So with these i am so bold to advise anyone
    seeking for a way to get there lover back to contact Dr.uneme on WhatsApp:
    { +2348143813120 }or via email at: {Unemespellben@gmail.com } I am so happy
    at least myself and my lover are back to each other again and going to
    spend the Life time together Thank to Dr. uneme once again....

    ReplyDelete
  6. I FOUND HELP
    Hello, i am from canada, I want to share this great testimony about how
    Dr.uneme helped me bring back my ex lover, During my search for solution i
    came in contact with Dr. uneme details and through his help my lover came
    back to me within 48 hours. So with these i am so bold to advise anyone
    seeking for a way to get there lover back to contact Dr.uneme on WhatsApp:
    { +2348143813120 }or via email at: {Unemespellben@gmail.com } I am so happy
    at least myself and my lover are back to each other again and going to
    spend the Life time together Thank to Dr. uneme once again....

    ReplyDelete
  7. Am Lizzy Dixon from Canada, I want to quickly tell the world that there is a real online spell caster that is powerful and genuine, His name is Chief He helped me recently to reunite my relationship with my husband who left me, When i contacted Chief he cast a love spell for me, and my husband who said he doesn't have anything to do with me again called me and started begging me to come back. he is back now with so much love and care. today i am glad to let you all know that this spell caster have the powers to restore broken relationship back. because i am now happy with my husband. To anyone who is reading this article and needs any help, Chief can also offer any type of help like, Curing of all types of Diseases, Court Cases, Pregnancy Spell, Spiritual protection and lot's more. You can contact him Via his email chiefdrlucky@gmail.com call or add him on whats-app with his phone number +2348132777335 Website: http://chiefdrluckysolutionhome.website2.me/   

    ReplyDelete
  8. EFFECTIVE AND POWERFUL LOVE SPELL CASTER ONLINE THANKS DR GBOJIE +2349066410185 
    My Husband and I have been together for 3years, we started having issues (JANUARY  12TH) and we both broke up this years, after our fight over his cheating habits which they all say it's not their fault but I was the one getting hurt for it . I was upset over the whole issue that I had to call for the separation but I felt really bad. The separation really had effects on my daughter who had to live away from her father that I had to think of a way to settle things out and find solution to my husband's awkward behavior. I found out about a spell caster  (Dr gbojie  ) on this site (  http://gbojiespiritualtemple.website2.me     ) who helped me with the problem to make my spouse come back to me and make him stop cheating. Soon, Richard came back to me begging at Sicily where I stayed after our divorce and I told him he has to show me he has changed for me to believe him. He came back twice after that day to Sicily begging me to have him back. Its been 1 month  now since my husband came back to me and we have been living together since that day. I believe this man can also help you too in getting your Ex lover back and also solve other problems  His email address is ( gbojiespiritualtemple@gmail.com  or gbojiespiritualtemple@yahoo.com ) also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2349066410185

    ReplyDelete
  9. REAL URGENT EFFECTIVE SPELL CASTER TO HELP BRING BACK EX LOVER AND SAVE MARRIAGE https://urgentspellcast.wordpress.com/

    Hello everyone my is Elisa Keily am so over whelmed with joy all thanks to Dr Raypower spell.my husband left me for another woman few years back and I was very devastated cause I never did anything wrong to him,I was left with my two kid and a job that pays little.i was almost giving up until I saw a testimony online about Dr Raypower and I decided to contact him.i explained my problem to him and he assured me I'll see a positive result after 24hurs,surprisingly my husband came back the day after the spell begging me to forgive him and promised to never leave.my husband has been back for 6 months now and we've never had any issues, am glad I didn't doubt Dr Raypower cause he sure can solve any problems with fast relief you can also contact him for help now

    Email: Urgentspellcast@gmail.com or Urgentspellcast@yahoo.com

    Website: http://urgentspellcast.website2.me/

    Blog: https://drraypower.blogspot.com/ 

    WhatsApp: +14243308109

    ReplyDelete

  10. Thank you Dr Williams for what you have done for me am so greatful my lover is back to me and we are now living happily together. Dr Williams love spell is very powerful and effective and it does not have any side effect as he promised I decided to give Dr Williams a try when my lover left me for another he helped me to cast a love spell on my lover that brought him back to me what makes me excited the most is that my lover did not even know he is under a spell if you are passing through relationship love problem I advice you to contact Dr Williams to get your problem solve. It's very hard to loose a love one and I know how it feels so do not let somebody take away your lover from you. Contact Dr Williams today and get your problem solve and if you need his help below here is his email address.
    drwilliams533@gmail. com or you can also reach him on his WhatsApp +2348136785562

    ReplyDelete